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So there you are in the only bodega on your block, and they don't speak a lick of English.  What's a hipster to do?  HOW AM I GOING TO ASK IF THEY CAN MAKE THE CUBANO SANDWICH VEGAN???  Well, here at The Bushwick Dream we have taken the time to tackle such burning questions.

1) I'll show you in a second. I have to pick the Instagram filter
 
Te enseño en un segundo. Tengo que escoger el filtro Instagram
 
 
2) Do you have any spare batteries for the portable record player?
 
Tienes baterias que te sobren para el toca discos portatil? 
 
 
3) Oh I already heard. I blogged about it yesterday.
 
Ah ya escuche de eso. Lo escribí en mi blog ayer.
 
 
4) Do you remember when this place was real?
 
Te acuerdas cuando este lugar era de adeveras? 
 
 
5) Yes mom, this is my apartment. Yes, that's a hole in the wall. Yes, that's my bed. It's called a loft bed. That's not dirt, it's paint. Mom,...mom please don't cry.
 
Si mamá, este es mi apartamento. Si ese es un hoyo en la pared. Si, esa es mi cama. Se llama litera. Eso no es mugre sino pintura. Mamá,.... mamá porfavor no llores. 

 

by:real dan  posted by:real dan  filed:Insights  08-20-12

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So there you are in the only bodega on your block, and they don't speak a lick of English.  What's a hipster to do?  HOW AM I GOING TO ASK IF THEY CAN MAKE THE CUBANO SANDWICH VEGAN???  Well, here at The Bushwick Dream we have taken the time to tackle such burning questions.

 

1)  It's weird, I never get stopped and frisked.

Es extraño, nunca me detuvo y registró a.

 

2)  I remember when this place used to be Buffalo Cantina

Recuerdo cuando este lugar era la cantina de búfalo.

 

3)  They better have two dollar pbr's here.

Mas vale tengan pbr's de los dolares aqui.

 

4)  Do you want to go to Birkam Yoga with me?

¿Quieres ir a Birkam yoga conmigo?

 

5)  I got this vest at The Urban Jungle.

Tengo este chaleco en La Urban Jungle.

 

by:angry dan  posted by:angry dan  filed:Insights  07-24-12

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So there you are in the only bodega on your block, and they don't speak a lick of English.  What's a hipster to do?  HOW AM I GOING TO ASK IF THEY CAN MAKE THE CUBANO SANDWICH VEGAN???  Well, here at The Bushwick Dream we have taken the time to tackle such burning questions.

 

 

1)  Just friend me on Facebook.

Solo haste amigo de mi en Facebook.

 
2)  What do you mean this place has a cover charge?
¿Que quierres decir con que este lugar tiene cover?
 
3)  It's getting cold.  Time to bring out my fingerless gloves, over sized scarf and pea coat.
Se esta poniendo frio.  Tiempo de sacar mis mintones, bufanda extendida, y chaquiton.
 
4)  I cut my own hair.
Yo corto mi propio pelo.
 
5)  Do you carry hemp milk?
¿Tienes usted leche canamo?
 
 
by:angry dan  posted by:angry dan  filed:Insights  03-15-12

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In third place:

@La_Shiinax3

22 yr old female; living in Bushwick on my own; no kids & never been pregnant... Is there an award for this?  If so, where's mine?

 
In second place:
 
@amoolia
I think mediocre skateboarding originated in Bushwick
 
 
And in first place and the winnah of the best tweet of the week is....
 
@jstraw
You know you're in Bushwick when you see a girl with a shaved head and a ponytail. 
by:angry dan  posted by:angry dan  filed:Insights  12-06-11

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So there you are in the only bodega on your block, and they don't speak a lick of English.  What's a hipster to do?  HOW AM I GOING TO ASK IF THEY CAN MAKE THE CUBANO SANDWICH VEGAN???  Well, here at The Bushwick Dream we have taken the time to tackle such burning questions.

1)  Mic check!  

¡ Checa Micrófono!
 
2)  Oh no!  I scuffed my Converse.
 
¡No mames, Fregué mis Converse!
 
3)  I know I should get this rash checked out. Is there a free clinic around here?
 
Se que debería cheqarme estas erupctiones.  ¿Hay alguna clínica cerca de aca?
 
4)  Fuck!  I hate Fox News.
 
¡Chinga!  Me caga Fox News.
 
5)  Look what I found in the trash.  It would look perfect on the wall.
 
 Ve lo que encontré en la basura.  Esto se vería perfecto en la pared.
 
by:angry dan  posted by:angry dan  filed:Insights  11-29-11

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Beacause you can't read 'em all, we bring you the best

 

 

In third place

@ xtopher1974

Sure the fancy end of Bushwick has cute cafes but we have better cell service plus better taquerias.

 

In second place:

@gradyderosa

Bushwick at 1 in the morning is one hell of an adrenaline rush.

 

And in first place and the winnah of the best tweet of the week is....

@lila_engel

"You should come visit me in Bushwick"

"Do you have brunch near you?  I don't want to get stuck there after dark"

by:emily  posted by:emily  filed:Insights  11-28-11

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As many of you may know, Swallow has gotten a face lift with a new mural. Now a large bird (let's assume it's a swallow) on a black background dominates its exterior and in big bold letters it proclaims "Welcome to Morgantown".  Many long term Bushwick residents don't seem so comfortable with this murals statement and it's easy to tell why.

The label "Morgantown" popped up sometime in the early 2000s describing a small oasis of artists in an otherwise strictly industrial and Puerto Rican area. This geographical term was only known to locals and created a sense of community, being not only a location but a cultural marker amongst its first wave of residents, many of which looked to deny mainstream culture and the trappings of the Chelsea style art world. But then the hype went into action. As Bushwick grew in reputation, Morgantown, it's fledgling epicenter, also gained great popularity. The term first appeared on the internet around 2005, possibly on justseeds.org, and by 2007 became widely used in flyers, craigslist ads and local blogs (this one included). Now references to "Morgantown" can be found in many large publications, tv shows and tourist guides. It is becoming a tourist destination, a magnet for posers, trust fund kids and outside forces looking to set up shop and make a buck (Swallow included).

"Mogantowns" legitimacy is being eclipsed by it's marketability, and there is no better proof then relative newcomer Swallow declaring "Welcome to Morgantown"; identifying itself with a community it took no part in forming, creating nothing more than a perfect spot to check maps and pose in front of for photos. Bad form.

by:real dan  posted by:real dan  filed:Insights  11-27-11

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So there you are in the only bodega on your block, and they don't speak a lick of English.  What's a hipster to do?  HOW AM I GOING TO ASK IF THEY CAN MAKE THE CUBANO SANDWICH VEGAN???  Well, here at The Bushwick Dream we have taken the time to tackle such burning questions.

 

 

1)  Which delivery service do you use?

¿Qual servicio de distribución se utiliza?

 

2)  I don't believe in Jesus...... but I believe in Kafka.

No creo en Dios...... pero creo en Kafka.

 

3)  Do you know where I can get a room with lots of natural light and high ceilings for $600?

¿Sabes donde puedo consigir un cuarto con mucho luz natural y con un techo alta para $600?

 

4)  Is there a yoga studio around here somewhere?

¿Ay un estudio de yoga por aqui?

 

5)  It's vintage.

Es antiguo.

 

 

by:angry dan  posted by:angry dan  filed:Insights  08-29-11

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Because you can't read 'em all, we bring you the best

In third place:

@ohdesigners

The people who live in the apt. above me are screaming and throwing things and I think it's all over who gets to use the microwave #bushwick

 

In second place:

@sarah_mas

Ok this is the third time I sat on the M and smelled weed,.  Oh Bushwick, you're silly.

 

And in first place and the winnah of the best tweet of the week is....

@sahMON3Y

Co-worker:  I used to live in Brooklyn,

Me:  What part??

Co-worker:  East Williamsburg.

Me:  Bitch you mean Bushwick.

by:emily  posted by:angry dan  filed:Insights  08-29-11

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Our newest installment!!!  Beacause you can't read 'em all, I've decided to bring you the best Bushwick tweets of the week....

 

In third place.....

@wakest

Bushwick smells like fish

 

In second place.....

@Regan_Hofmann

Watching #mysocalledlife for fasion tips.  I'm going to be the coolest kid in Bushwick.

 

And in first place and the winnah of the best tweet of the week is.....

@salboz

#overheard in my local grocery store in #bushwick "Dad, this grocery store sucks!  They don't even have vegan cheese!"#bkgirlproblems

 

by:angry dan  posted by:emily  filed:Insights  08-14-11

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So there you are in the only bodega on your block, and they don't speak a lick of English.  What's a hipster to do?  HOW AM I GOING TO ASK IF THEY CAN MAKE THE CUBANO SANDWICH VEGAN???  Well, here at The Bushwick Dream we have taken the time to tackle such burning questions.

 

1)  I desgined it myself. 

Lo diseñé yo mismo

 

2)  Is this vegan?

¿Esto es vegano?

 

3)  I'm looking for a roommate.

Estoy buscando un nuevo compañero

 

4)  Do you have loosies?

Tiene usted un frajo?

 

5)  Can I get my beard trimmed?

Puedo recortar mi barba?

by:angry dan  posted by:angry dan  filed:Insights  08-08-11

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So there you are in the only bodega on your block, and they don't speak a lick of English.  What's a hipster to do?  HOW AM I GOING TO ASK IF THEY CAN MAKE THE CUBANO SANDWICH VEGAN???  Well, here at The Bushwick Dream we have taken the time to tackle such burning questions. 

 

1)  This better be Fair Trade, cold pressed, single origin coffee with Brita ice cubes.

Mas vale que sea cafe de solo un origen, prensado en frio y de comercio justo con heilo Brita.

 

2)  I don't eat there, they got a "b".

Yo no come aqui, ellos recibieron una "b".

 

3)  Of course this is a fixed gear.

Claro que es un cambio fijado.

 

4)  I just moved here from __________.

Me acabo de mudar aqui de __________.

 

5)  Stop whistling at my girlfriend.

Deja de estar pitando a mi novia.

 

by:angry dan  posted by:angry dan  filed:Insights  07-30-11

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So there you are in the only bodega on your block, and they don't speak a lick of English.  What's a hipster to do?  HOW AM I GOING TO ASK IF THEY CAN MAKE THE CUBANO SANDWICH VEGAN???  Well, here at The Bushwick Dream we have taken the time to tackle such burning questions. 

 

1)  Where can I find the skinny jeans?  

 

¿Dónde puedo encontrar los jeans apretado?

 

2)  Its an obscure band, you’ve never heard of them.

  Es una banda rara, nunca has escuchado sobre ellos.

3)  Your rent is how much?

 ¿Su renta es cuanto?

4)  Do you have a spare rolling paper?

 ¿Tiene usted un papel extra para rodar?

5)  Yeah, my dog’s a rescue.

Sí, mi perro fue rescatado.

6)  No, this is my parents credit card.

No, esta es la tarjeta de crédito de mis padres.

7)  Does this come in plaid?  

¿Esto viene en gaban?

8)  I can’t make it, I’ve got band practice. 

No lo puedo hacer, tengo práctica de la banda.

9)  God I hate gentrification.  

Dios, odio gentrificación.

10)  So I’m thinking about applying to grad school.

Estoy pensando en solicitar a la escuela de posgrado.

by:angry dan  posted by:angry dan  filed:Insights  07-08-11

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Misspleed turk
by:angry dan  posted by:  filed:Insights  02-03-11

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dummy

Bushwick please don't walk your dogs in the grocery store. Thats where people buy their fucking food.

by:real dan  posted by:real dan  filed:Insights  11-22-10

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Now's our chance.
by:angry dan  posted by:  filed:Insights  09-07-10

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Cory Feldman is crying into an empty martini glass.
by:angry dan  posted by:  filed:Insights  03-10-10

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Apparently evolutionary psychologist Dr Satoshi Kanazawa has found that liberals and atheists tend to be a bit more intelligent than their god-fearing conservative counterparts. The National Geographic has written up a nice article about it. All of a sudden the legacy of George W. Bush makes a bit more sense.

Ann Coulter

by:real dan  posted by:real dan  filed:Insights  03-04-10

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Any bicyclist in this city knows that you gotta watch your ass. With all the crazy drivers and poorly marked, if not completely lacking, bike lanes its a risky ride out there. Well thanks to Lazer Helmets being struck by some asshole cab driver may be a bit more survivable. Using "SuperSkin" technology they have created a helmet that better deflects impact and lessens the rotational force caused by, lets say, bouncing your head off the street at 30 mph. The future is now people.

by:real dan  posted by:real dan  filed:Insights  02-19-10

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how many shapes and lines and other graphic elements are there to compose the message, the art, the style of one wall? i guess it depends on the angle you use to see and the way you document it. few days ago i happened to see several shapes of heart on this wall, happy valentine's day.

by:iris  posted by:real dan  filed:Insights  02-09-10

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For those of us who don't have cable:

by:real dan  posted by:real dan  filed:Insights  02-05-10

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Today I saw a girl drop her cell phone, when it bounced the back came off and the battery popped out. The battery landed in what may have been the grossist puddle in Harlem, clearly at least 6" deep, full of garbage and topped with the a thin oil slick. She sucked it up, put her hand in the muck and retrieved the battery. She then turned around and proceeded to accidentally kick the cell phone into the sewer. The look on her face was priceless. She put the battery back in the puddle and walked away cursing. :)
by:angry dan  posted by:  filed:Insights  01-21-10

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Studies show that out of all the states in the USA, NY has the most unhappy of people. Are you really that surprised? Read more and see the states happiness ranking HERE.
by:real dan  posted by:  filed:Insights  12-22-09

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by:angry dan  posted by:  filed:Insights  12-06-09

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by:angry dan  posted by:  filed:Insights  11-17-09

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Well con-fucking-gradulations. King bloombucks is going to win an incredibly tight race. I just hope by posting this before the votes are completly counted it'll have the Dewey/Truman effect. To all of you whom didn't vote, I hope you die of dysentery (which will inevetibly happen as rent will now be skyrocketing and you'll be living in the gutter.). To the fucking imbaciles whom voted for Scumberg, I wish worse. I hope you get explosive diarrahea caught between subway stops with either a track fire or a sick passenger in the tunnel ahead of you. Then I hope you die (of fucking embarrasment.). Also to asshats that allowed Kingburg to run thrice, I don't even need to belittle you, you've done it already. I hope Satan isn't real, because he's got your fucking number.
by:angry dan  posted by:  filed:Insights  11-03-09

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FUCKING VOTE!!!!!!! That is all.
by:angry dan  posted by:  filed:Insights  11-03-09

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It's a really obscure number, I don't think you'd know it.
by:angry dan  posted by:  filed:Insights  10-02-09

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Or not.

by:angry dan  posted by:real dan  filed:Insights  09-25-09

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Ever wonder what happens with that grass the trooper took from you? Well, now you know, and knowing is half the battle.

by:angry dan  posted by:real dan  filed:Insights  09-25-09

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In the end you just get a bowl of pits.
by:angry dan  posted by:  filed:Insights  09-18-09

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Misinformation is flooding the veins of this country. A juggernaut propaganda machine is in place and peoples patriotism is the fuel for a nonsensical fight. Be afraid.

by:real dan  posted by:real dan  filed:Insights  09-16-09

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If god were watching..... He'd be upset. You sicko.
by:angry dan  posted by:  filed:Insights  08-20-09

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Please remember to conserve your yellow paint. You'll never know when you'll need to paint a schoo bu.

by:angry dan  posted by:real dan  filed:Insights  08-18-09

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If you aren't already aware, these people driving around Bushwick are crazy and just so you know, there is a reason that side mirrors fold in on many models of cars and if you don't use this nifty feature you can't really complain when some reckless asshole rips the mirror off of your BMW.

by:real dan  posted by:real dan  filed:Insights  08-16-09

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by:angry dan  posted by:  filed:Insights  08-06-09

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I suggest maybe a drawer or on a hook near the door, preferably on the inside of your apartment. Places I do not suggest; inside a lion or on a wrought iron fence post on Grattan street right near where you park.

by:angry dan  posted by:real dan  filed:Insights  08-06-09

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You have to try this site it's fucking awesome.
by:angry dan  posted by:  filed:Insights  08-06-09

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This may very well be correct.

by:real dan  posted by:real dan  filed:Insights  08-04-09

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So the BrownSTONER.com posted an article about "our kids" being exposed to "pot in the park" and "porn at the library." They say it's part of the "local culture" and that "love it or hate it, it's here to stay." 1) If you are smoking weed near children in the park or near the playground, you could and should be arrested. Not because it's "against the law", but because "you're a fucking numb-skull." 2) If you are a grown adult and you are viewing porn on a library computer, you could and should beat off. Not because "it's the right thing to do" but because "you could and should be arrested." Read it here.
by:angry dan  posted by:  filed:Insights  07-25-09

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You can't fucking fool me.

by:angry dan  posted by:real dan  filed:Insights  07-25-09

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You know how people are always chopping up those wet paint signs to say such clever musings as "ain't wet & wet taint." Well the other day when I got off the L train at 6th avenue I saw one that read "t pain." I don't know what the hell that means, but I'm pretty sure it's excruciating.
by:angry dan  posted by:  filed:Insights  07-21-09

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Just wanted to apologize for the downtime folks, ran into some unexpected issues with the server maintenance window but everything is back in order now.
by:root  posted by:  filed:Insights  07-19-09

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I have come to the particularly ubsurd, gross realization that the porn revolution hath taken a crazy leap forward. Any device that is delivering Internet to phones is delivering porn. That's right, folks. Spank-ta-vision to go 24/7/52/365. You now have the right to look at the people who touch your food slightly differently. Also, I'd start tipping better and stop being rude just for the fuck of it. You want fries with that? No? What's that? Sorry no refunds.
by:angry dan  posted by:  filed:Insights  07-17-09

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I would like to believe that in the future, say, when I'm like 60 (if I make it that far) things will have only changed for the funny. I hope to make a post about 30 years from now with an ipod hanging from razor wire.

by:angry dan  posted by:real dan  filed:Insights  07-14-09

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One white fedora with matching white shoes $185. One lime green suit, $150.99. Being so tired from pimpin' you're sleeping on a bench at third avenue..... fucking priceless.

by:angry dan  posted by:real dan  filed:Insights  07-14-09

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its all a matter of change in perspective.

by:real dan  posted by:real dan  filed:Insights  07-13-09

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I tell a girl I have to get up early in the morning for work. She ask,"What, like noon?" I tell her "8:30." Response,"wow, that's like the crack!" ...
by:real dan  posted by:  filed:Insights  07-13-09

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So you're sitting around and you have some cardboard and spray paint. You're 19 and just read The Rum Diaries and "it changed your life." So epic. You're also not very creative and definitely you're not very smart. So what better way to immortalize good ol' Hunter than to spray paint HIS emblem in drab white on a brick wall the size of infant. Listen jerk off, if you're going to spray paint on a wall, do something good. Do something original. Don't take someone's shit that's already INCREDIBLY overplayed. Why don't you just spray paint the Nike sign everywhere, and sign it Banksy. Fucking idiot.

by:angry dan  posted by:real dan  filed:Insights  07-10-09

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Okay so here's the situation. My parents went away on a weeks vacation. But enough about that, on to the bedbugs. This is the 2nd one you've found there RD. I think you need a ton of poisonous white powder strewn throughout your mattress and hard wood floors. If you need help I would try hazmat. Also from now on anyone entering my apartment will have to strip naked and be deloused like jail. I already have roaches (not even the "cool kind") I don't need bedbugs too.
by:angry dan  posted by:  filed:Insights  06-24-09

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There is no escaping them. No matter how cautious you may be. They will find a way to crawl in your window or ride one of your friends into your apartment. This little bastard I found darting around frantically in my bedroom. It was odd. He must have been lost. His death came by way of the blunt force of a copy of 1984 catching him as he tried to scurry along the edge of my dresser. I am now left with the concern that he may have siblings.

by:real dan  posted by:real dan  filed:Insights  06-24-09

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Everything should be live and ready to go folks, have fun!
by:root  posted by:  filed:Insights  06-22-09

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all content is property of The Bushwick Dream unless otherwise stated
Features
Glen Friedel: Artist, Bushwick resident, one hell of a guy.


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Bushwick Artist Feature: QRST


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